All
Things
Must
End

We've come a long way. Now it's time to do the final steps.

This is it: The final Zoomoid album.

Let's start at the beginning...

Before we get into what this is, I need to explain a couple of things. Things that lead up to this moment, and things that paved the way to where we are now.

A Brief Biography of Me, Zoomoid

I promise, it's not thaaaaat long, and it might help you understand the album, its motives, and most importantly its consequences. If you want to, you can skip it.

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In 2013 someone hit my reset button. After a terrifying accident, and the subsequent long recovery, I got into music making. YouTube provided all the resources I needed to get started, and I went heads-first into Trance and Progressive House, both genres I listened frequently to back then.

Learning was (and still is) a wonderful thing, and sometimes I miss those days for the simple fact that those days (and nights) are truly cherished memories. It took me until 2016, however, to produce anything that I considered worth releasing, whatever that may have meant back then.

Naturally, this track was little but an attempt to recreate and fuse together what all those YouTube tutorials taught me, and it's not worth going into further detail here. Though, the inclined can go on a search to find the traces of this track. It made it to Soundcloud and YouTube at some point.

Remaining in House music, I also made a remix of David Guetta'sMemories! Ironically enough, Guetta would remix his own track 4 years later, which is even weaker than the original from 2009! — just my oppinion.

Originally however, I wanted to make Drum & Bass, which was one genre I (back then) only recently discovered. I could never quite figure it out, though, back then... Trying to recreate what I was listening to did not get me anywhere, and it would take another 2 years to get there.

Meanwhile, I also got into Techno. The Techno I was listening to back then was very contemporary, and does not have anything to do with today's Techno, which has quickly become extremely popular. To some extent, I'm all here for that, but maybe you already see the huge valley in tempo range between the two genres I was primarily listening to; that's what I consider to be the Hardcore range, and I'd rather not talk about... (which is sort of where the today's Techno lives in – don't wanna go there)

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When Life Is About Making Memories landed in 2018, I had already released several attempts at proper tracks in the form of Singles. But releasing the first proper album-sized collection of tracks, that also had a concept built-in started the next episode of Zoomoid as a producer. Ideas grew larger than just single tracks, and spanned further than just five minutes of some repetitive loops and samples clicked together in Ableton Live.

Album cover of Life Is About Making Memories

It got me going onto more elaborate sound design and composition (though it is still mostly improvised and by no means professional, rather “if it sounds good, it's good”).

With that, releases became a more regular thing. Studying Computer Science full-time gave me enough evenings without plans to waste hours on end staring into the ever so grey user interface of Live.

Album cover of Eigenräume (Standard Edition)
Album cover of Eigenräume (Extended Edition)

In 2019, I made an album that was released in twowaves, called Eigenräume. It took some inspiration from places I held very dear to my heart, and places I wanted (and some still want to visit). That album had concept down to it's core fibers, and it defined theZoomoid sound in terms of electronic, techno-y sound design and composition. While I failed with the original idea of producing an album where all tracks would blend seamlessly into each other on the first try (which is why there are two versions of the album), the second try (the Extended Version) got it right for at least the first six tracks, afterwards things derailed a bit. Notably, one of those other tracks, “Outer Space” was a piece I thought too good to just stash at the end of the album, which is why it I made it longer andremastered it for the late-2019's “301 Moved Permanently”.

Album cover of Public Transportation EP
Album cover of 301 Permanently Moving

I made Public Transportation from an idea on a train ride back home (see what I did there? Backreferencing?) and that stuck with me. I really like trains — which you might alreay know — particularly seeing the world from inside a train, passing by. I find this to be really peaceful, and it's one of the few things where my brain will completely shut off. So I made an album about a (hypothetical) train journey, which announcements as to where the train is going to stop next. Go have a listen if you haven't yet, it's also really short, then come back to this.

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In 2020 I hit a brick wall. And not the good one. As the world went into lockdown, I (as the artist) struggled to find inspiration, energy, and all that what came easily before. In hindsight, this would have been a good point to start therapy, probably.

I was also in love. But the kind that wasn't mutual. With a shattered heart, I wanted to write a love song. The silly things you do when you're in love, I guess. I thought I could.

Album cover of Shades of Yellow

Shades of Yellow was the two-track EP that came out of that episode. My attempt at a love song remained nothing more than the title of a track that (to be brutally honest) seems like a more refined copy of a previous track I made, calledUtopia from “Life Is About Making Memories”. Other than being calledMalheureux en Amour (which I also managed to misspell on the first release of the EP, where, when trying to fix the issue, I managed to upload an unfinished version of the cover image, which is why the path on the top blue wave doesn't connect properly on the right side — look it up...), not much remains of the title's meaning. The song is rather upbeat for such a topic, to be honest...

Anyways, that EP had a title track, Shades of Yellow, which stands in stark contrast to the previously discussed track: it's a Tech-House track, rather long and tells a way better story than Malheureux en Amour. It was probably inspired a lot by Wild World, another Zoomoid song, released as one of those Singles that have since disappeared from the discography, but remains as a VIP Mix on “Life Is About Making Memories”.

That title track sampled the German TV series Dark, in particular a dialogue where two protagonists talk about time and their grasp of it. It resonated with me. Quite a bit actually...

Album cover of Voyager

In the second half of 2020 I wanted to do something new. While the world was held captive by a global pandemic, I had enough of sitting in my small bedroom in my slightly bigger appartment. Parallel to starting a new job, I started collecting ideas that turned into tracks that turned into Voyager

Early sketches for Voyager, still being calle Artemis here

Surely, I'm not the first one to use that title, it's by no means unique. But it fits the concept really well. A working title of the album was Artemis (the name of the NASA mission to the moon on the 2020s). You get the picture.

It's tracks sort of guide you on a journey through space, away from our pale blue dot in the night sky. It's ten tracks are all in a similar style, they match together really well, and I'm quite proud of the entire album. It's a nice experience to listen to it from start to end — like a concept album would.

The album's title track Voyager also had me singing for the first time ever — and I'm not a singer. I'm not even sure if I know how to work with vocals...

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The escapism that Voyager provided, artistically, did not last for long though. I went down into that dark hole that is depression. Combining it with a slowly creeping burn-out from studying and having a job in a start-up, I ended up in a really sad state of mind.

Pink Floyd's Comfortably Numb probably captures it best. I have a hang of describing my mental state with music. I've an incredibly deep emotional response to music, it's like I'm creating a soundtrack to my own life by choosing tracks that display my emotional state. It's amazing and I wouldn't want to miss it, but it makes tough situations even more tough.

Album cover of Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht captured those heavy, sad tones. The album cover is a picture my grandfather drew that I hold very dear to my heart (especially since he passed away in 2023).

It's an entirely instrumental piece of music, no drums, just instruments, carried by Felt Instrument's brilliant Lekko piano, harmonies, melodies, melancholia, the wish to be more, to do more, experience more, live a life... It also manifests the idea of windows of opportunity and time and, in this way, started picking up the fact that time as a human being is limited. That's a thought you don't have for as long as you're young, whatever that may mean, but in that dark period of time, I was starting to face my own “getting older”, facing my own mortality in a way — something you would probably not expect from a 22-year old at the time.

I was also really alone at times, and then my brain goes for wild rides of what if's...

Sehnsucht's central motive (and I'm sorry this is getting a bit heavy, and also relys on understanding some German, but you'll have to anyways for understanding what's to come), is the phrase, or rather set of questionsWas war? Was ist? Was bleibt? which broadly translates to What has been? What is (now)? What remains?. It's somewhat indicative of the questions I asked myself:What remains? asks the question I wanted to answer when starting out with making music in 2013. Eight years later, I started reviewing my work. Had i succeeded in making something that's worth lasting? I honestly can't tell. But I want it to last.

Photo of an image of my grandfather, depicting the Chiemsee in southern Germany

In that moment, evaluating my own creation over the past years, something sparked the idea that culminated in this album. The idea of endings. I saw myself burning out, fading away, silently quitting making music. That was a path I did not want to go down on. When I announced in late-2021 that Zoomoid would be taking an indefinite hiatus, I wasn't sure if I would be able to come back, to wake up again.

But here we are.

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On December 29th, 2013, someone hit my reset button.

I've been Zoomoid for 10 years now.

I've been through a lot of ups and downs. It's time for something new.

Which means I have to leave something behind. To cite a film that's had monumental influence on me and my music: “Newton's third law: you have to leave something behind.”

Which means... this is it.

The final Zoomoid album.

The last chapter.

All Things Must End Cover

or listen to the entire album from beginning to end here, context included!

01All That Could Have Been

This is where it all begins. The introduction. The thought of all that could have been. That title sets up everything that is to follow from here. All those possible outcomes...

All That Could Have Been is an homage to all those intros to albums I've written — something that I always thought I was rather good at.

For just a moment in the beginning of 2023, I felt so amazing. Floating above the clouds is an incredible feeling.

All those endorphines pushed me through the first months of the year. They would fade too quickly...

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02Nur Für Einen Augenblick

...and in the blink of an eye, I was back in the deep dark hole. All that came crashing down. It was never built to last. Time flew by and I found myself back in old habits.

Nur Für Einen Augenblick is older than these experiences though. It was originally written back in 2022, on a rare evening of inspiration and creativity. It had many different working titles throughout its design period: What's Next was one of them, and I think it already captures the spirit of the entire album in some sense.

It's an uplifting kind of track, in its core a Drum & Bass song that heavily leans into orchestral music (which is where most of the instruments usually belong). It's inspired by the works of artists like Keeno and Etherwood.

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03Ein Tag Im April (Interlude)

Ein Tag Im April, or a day in April spans a bridge between Nur Für Einen Augenblick and Angst vor der Zukunft. It's a wild ride, an experience, like a day in my life in that particular month.

Between ups and downs, between running 21 kilometers on a random saturday in pouring rain for the sheer reason of feeling the runner's high, feeling weightless, feeling so much, and crashing down completely while in Amsterdam at a conference.

It's also more than just a single day. A day became the representation of the entire mood I went through in April of 2023. It was a ride through some of the most euphoric and also crushing times.

The sonic atmosphere of this track is comprised of vast reverbs, familiar sounds from previous Zoomoid releases, heavily distorted and modulated to fade into Angst vor der Zukunft.

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04Angst vor der Zukunft

Angst vor der Zukunft is one of the protagonists of the album. Afraid of the future characterizes what I felt over the last year. Both in the short term and in the long term I'm not sure where things are going. Maybe that's not a bad thing. Maybe it is. I don't know.

Angst vor der Zukunft also digs into the grasp and understanding of time, albeit, entirely subjective. I feel like time is running out. Not for one particular thing. Just in general. Time is running out... “Wie kann man Zeit haben wenn sie eindeutig dich hat&rdquo.

Angst vor der Zukunft is referential to some other important Zoomoid releases. Its roots go back to tracks like Wild World, the softer side of Voyager, but most importantly Shades of Yellow. The motive of both tracks is the same, both circle around the central quote from Dark, but this time, it's me saying the words, as if this would give them more gravity. The break even uses the same instruments as the original, Shades of Yellow, even though slightly adapted to fit the rest of the track.

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05Outer Space (Reprise)

Angst vor der Zukunft bridges over into another reworked Zoomoid track, Outer Space. Outer Space was originally released on the Extended Edition ofEigenräume. It was a Techno track, but a melodic one, that would have also perfectly fitted onto Voyager. It was later remastered and made into a longer mix version on the 301 Permanently Moving EP.

In 2021 I released Sehnsucht, which was entirely acoustic, heavily relying on the softness of Felt Instrument's Lekko piano. Its sound has a level of intimacy that inspired me to remixing other Zoomoid tracks with those softer instruments into warm, ambient, and cozy versions. I've been sitting on this remix for a while now, the project file almost got lost between different devices and setups. Now it get's to see the world, as a reprise of all the great Zoomoid tracks that lay in the past.

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06Illusions

Illusions is a track I wrote over the course of a weekend. I started out on a friday evening with an idea for something that got inspired by previous track such as the “Im Schatten der Nacht” EP, Voyager tracks and more. By sunday afternoon, I had a fully-arranged and mixed track.

When the drums fade away in the middle part of the track to reveal the gigantic space of synthesizers where, just for a moment, you can close your eyes, dream of a distant, empty, resonant space, you can maybe understand where the track gets its name from.

And when the drums come back they take you back to reality, back to the apex of the rollercoaster that is life, down into a valley of loudness and impressions and emotions.

Illusions would be perfectly fine on its own, but in the context of this album, it blooms, it provides a five-minute escape into the time and space of Im Schatten der Nacht.

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07Delay (Long Version)

Talking about reworking, remixing, remastering older Zoomoid releases,Delay from Public Transportation always seemed a bit short to me. Its length on the original EP is fine, all other tracks fit together, but there was more for Delay.

In the same way that Outer Space in this album's form existed way before the album, the Long Version of Delay existed in a prototype form for more than two years before I started working on this album. I considered releasing it as a single, but that never seemed right to do. And so, when time came to find tracks that captured my spirit, skill, and sound, the characteristics of Zoomoid, Delay filled that spot perfectly.

It's not just an longer version of the original though. I recorded some new elements, like a lot of guitars, for both lead elements, and ambience, and it gives the track a special atmosphere of almost being real instruments. Also, the drums got a complete make-over, which for a Drum & Bass track, is pretty much an entirely new track...

Delay is not the last reference to “Public Transportation” though, that spot is reserved for later...

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08Maybe Someday

How can I even describe Maybe Someday? Maybe you remember my attempt at writing a love song from the biography above — If you didn't read that, no worries! — well this is it. This is my final attempt at it, I guess. Is it though? I'm not sure. Could be. Could also not be. Who knows. While I try to figure that out, listen to it, maybe you can figure it out!

It is, in essence, again an attempt to figure out how my perception of time works, but also so much more. It's a declaration of surrender to time, where I'm not sure if I'll ever have the time and, more importantly, timing, to say all the things I want to say, do all the things I want to do. I know for a fact that I will not... but maybe someday, if everything has been figured out, the stars align, and I have the courage... then maybe someday...

And maybe it's also a song about grief. There's really alot I could interpret into the track, and I think, that's some of its beauty.

Of all of them, the track Maybe Someday is probably my favourite track. Possibly because it's the most real, makes me feel the most most vulnerable and was written last; it captures that emotion that arise when you finally finalise something, the kind of feeling of coming home.

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09Window of Opportunity (Too Late)

We are now at a transition in the general feel of the album.Window of Opportunity picks up on those topics from the previous track, where I'm not sure if I'll ever be at the right spot at the right time and have the courage and strength to do the right things (what's right is clearly subjective to the situation). This idea of missing the window of opportunity has become a principle of my skewed life philosophy, that, no matter what, I will always miss it, that I'm doomed to...

I wanted to make a track about this for at least as long as Sehnsucht, and in a sense, I already did: Türen stems from a similar idea, that doors close before I have the opportunity to enter them. The idea comes from Kafka's Before the Law, albeit, much transferred, and the title's interpretation can be more optimistic, when considering that new doors also may open...

Window of Opportunity borrows its sound design fromSehnsucht, which is only reasonable, considering the similarities in motive. Towards its end, the sounds shift into a combination of a Mellotron and the pluck sound of Porter Robinson's “Sad Machine”, also picking up its melody on the last few notes. I still think that Worlds, which included “Sad Machine” is one of best album ever made, and having passed on the opportunity to see him perform it live is one of those Windows of Opportunity that I've missed in life.

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10Lazarus

With Lazarus starts the transition away from what Zoomoid was into what Zoomoid has become. The vibe shifts away from referencing and deriving music from existing work, into new, uncharted terrories.

Lazarus starts with tragic strings and, one last time, using that tune-in sample of the orchestra that already was in Shades of Yellow and Ein Tag im April. The almost wailing piano melody brings down the track into looming, scary space...

That accident in 2013 where I was in intensive care for two weeks is the immediate inspiration for this track (and also the next).

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11Rebirth

Rebirth is the logical consequence of Lazarus. For the longest time during the creation of the album, the tracks were just one, named Lazarus/Rebirth. They were only split up towards the end of mastering, to bring the number of tracks up to 15 (and also for me to write about each part individually here).

Rebirth is what's on the other side of that accident, that horrifying moment, that life-changing experience.

It resolves into a sonic space of synthesizers and arppegios that evolves into a crushing, distorted mood, where only a heartbeat is left.

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12Anywhere Else At Any Other Time

That heartbeat continues into “Anywhere Else At Any Other Time”. This track had many names throughout its way to release. It was called Leaving, Departure, all things related to the central motive, a slow, but driving melody that envelopes the announcement sample from a train journey. This was the motive of Public Transportation and this track, Anywhere Else At Any Other Time, waves this EP goodbye at the train's platform.

I like to imagine that the train takes me somewhere far away, maybe to the sea, to the beach, to a place I can only imagine, not remember...

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13Echoes of You

Echoes of You starts exactly there, in a cottage at the beach. The soundscape at the start sets up a journey into deep atmospheric sounds with lots of echo and reverb.

I wrote the song the week my grandfather died. He probably had the most artistical influence on my own work than anyone else combined. Due to his deteriorating hearing, he was unable to experience my music. It hurts knowing I never had the opportunity to show him.

I'd like to think that some day I can show it to him. Maybe someday.

As the song ends, a door opens, and the listener is greeted by sounds of waves and sea gulls. We are now approaching the final moments, the last chapter.

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14The Last Chapter

The Last Chapter is exactly that: the last chapter. The tragedy of all the previous tracks, all those memories, experiences, emotions, they culminate in a final, soft, gloomy track about what has been, what is, and what will be.

The song brings everything down, into just a few, slow moving chamber strings, the soft piano and then nothing.

Into that silence follows a monologue, my monologue, the last chapter of Zoomoid. It's an admission that all things must end, and that we have reached that point now, where I have to leave Zoomoid behind.

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15All Things Must End

And with that, we rise one last time, for old time's sake, into All Things Must End, the album's title track and also the final Zoomoid track.

I was long unsure of where to place this track. I had it written before most of the other tracks on the album. And when all the puzzle pieces finally joined, it found its place right at the end.

One last time, gathering all the energy, for a final, euphoric, powerful stride towards what Zoomoid is and was and will be.

And with that triumphal outro, the dramatic violin vibrato and the swelling of the trombones, the album comes to an end. This is it. The final tone. As it resonates away and leaves you in silence, remember everything that was. Just for a brief moment... and try to imagine what could have been...

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I've decided the outcome of this contemplation for you.

I've decided that I'm done with Zoomoid, that I have to move on.

In a sense I've taken away that decision how you evaluate and conclude my work from you. But it was always mine to make.

I will leave you with that. I don't think I've anything else to say or do.

This is farewell then. Thank you — you reading those lines right now — for the time we had. Thank you for being there. Maybe you can cherish those moments the same way I do. Maybe, after reading all this and hearing my story, you can even understand.

I would be honored if you carry a piece of me, Zoomoid, out into the world. Don't worry, I'm not disappearing anytime soon... I'm just... shedding my old skin, stretching out the newly formed wings of freedom, detaching myself from the persona that I grew and carried and nurtured over the last decade.

I'm sorry if this is not the ending that you wanted. I'm sorry if you didn't want an ending at all. Know that I did not make that decision lightly. But I firmly believe it's the right thing.

Any maybe, just maybe, in a different space and time, we will meet again.

Thank you! I love you!

P.S.:

I don't want to be egocentrical for making all of this just about myself. We've come this way together, and I've learned, and experienced, and felt so much beautiful things because of you.

This all makes me incredibly proud.

But I've experienced a lot of tragedy and grief, a lot of hard times over the last couple of years. I've lost a lot of beautiful things and people, and with that, pieces of myself.

I've lost myself along the way. Being an artist became harder and harder for me, to write and compose new music became this unbearable task that i dreaded. I took ever-longer breaks from it, and considered quietly quitting several times.

As the idea to finish the project, to finalize things, to bring things to a conclusion, sparked, I felt relief. As with so many things in these current times, I only had to be strong one more time. After that, things would be done, I'd be able to let new things enter my life.

And so I wrote my last album. I tried to capture so many things, so many emotions, so many states of mind in tracks, tried to create a holistic experience, something that would remain relevant beyond the lifetime of Zoomoid.

I think, for once, at least in some parts, I succeeded.

All Things Must End is my last album. What comes afterwards is pretty much left to time. It has become time for me to become just Alex again.

That doesn't mean that I'm never going to make music again. It just marks the ending for Zoomoid. The final chapter. Such that a new book can begin.

— Alex